Safety at Play Parties

Play parties are great fun! But because of the activities and arrangements involved there is a great need to be aware of safety and security for the guests. General advice on organising play parties can be found in the 'arranging play parties' section of this site.


At a private party the guest list can be carefully considered and only those people with whom the organiser is comfortable and familiar invited. People whom the organisers don't know personally should be vouched for by another guest. It is important to know that those who will attend are honest members of the Scene, not reporters, and that they will be comfortable with the type of party to which they are being invited.

Before any party or on attendance at a club, everyone attending should receive a list of the rules and procedures to be observed. Anyone who does not want to stick to those rules, or who feels that they do not provide a level of safety and security with which they are comfortable, should not attend. It is important that that everyone understands the need for security, keeping timings, venue etc. confidential. The one exception to this is for personal security arrangements if you are attending a party with people whom you don't know well. For more details see the section on 'Meeting new partners'.


As guests arrive they should be identified, welcomed, asked if they received and understand the rules and arrangements for the night and if they have any questions, and directed to the facilities, emergency equipment, safety staff and exits. The party organiser is always responsible for the safety of their guests but may decide to arrange for experienced players to act as Dungeon Masters or Safety Officers. DMs and SOs should be knowledgeable about the Scene, familiar with all of the equipment, know the location of and how to use all emergency equipment and exits, be First Aid trained, not drink or play while 'on duty', and be ready to help or advise where needed without interfering unnecessarily.

If you provide toys make sure that they are sterile and serviceable before the guests arrive. If candles are to be used for lighting or wax play ensure the area is clear of flammable materials and that cold water (to treat burns) and a fire extinguisher are readily available. If a St. Andrews cross or A frame is provided check that it is properly secured to the wall and the wrist and ankle fastenings can be quickly released. If electrical play is anticipated sufficient wall sockets or extension leads which have been secured so that they will not trip guests are necessary. The organiser or DM/SO should check that any electrical equipment to be used is safe and that the players know how to use it competently. If you are a guest, examine all play furniture to ensure that it is serviceable, safe and you know how to use it before playing. The First Aid kit, water, paramedic shears, rubbish bins, disposable gloves, condoms, disinfectant wipes, tissues etc should all be positioned where they are easily found and accessible.

Lighting within the play area needs to be sufficient for Dominants to be able to clearly see their targets and the reactions of their subs, including body language. Music must be at a low enough level that a safe word can be heard and understood instantly. There should be cold water and disposable cups available in the play room; both subs and Doms can get very dehydrated while Scening.

Dungeon Masters or Safety Officers should keep a friendly eye on everything that is going on, including the chill-out area. They must be ready to give help if needed. They should also watch for people who have played, retired to the rest room, had a few drinks and decided to return to the play area. Too much drink does not go well together with Scene play. The Dom needs to be ever alert and accurate and it is dangerous for a sub to play when they are not fully aware of what is going on with their body, endorphins dull the senses quite nicely enough as it is!

As a private party comes to an end and people start to leave remind your happy guests that the need for security continues. You may be using the same venue for a future party.

Essential and Recommended Safety Equipment

Scene First Aid and precautions

Be safe. Enjoy!